Tell me how you really feel…

In preparation for a workshop on beauty, I sent out a survey to 100 women between the ages of 13 and 65. When calculating the results, unfortunately, I wasn’t at all surprised by the answers.

I found it interesting that more than half of the women who responded with “Yes” to the question, “Is beauty important for your overall happiness?” apologized for it saying that they knew it was bad to make beauty a priority. Every one of them claims to be a christian. If you look just three questions before that, the #1 answer when asked “What do you think of when you hear the word beauty?” is “Nature, God, Creation.” What is there to feel guilty about or apologize for?

Clearly there is a vast difference between our definition of beauty and what we think God says about beauty. Why is that? Do you think God cares about beauty? Why or why not?

Results for “Beauty Undefined”

What do you like most about your appearance?
#1 Eyes
#2 Hair
#3 Nothing

What do you like least about your appearance?
#1 Stomach
#2 Thighs
#3 Butt

What is the one thing you would change about your physical appearance?
#1 Thinner/More toned overall
#2 Stomach
#3 Complexion

What is the first thing you see when you look in the mirror?
#1 Aging
#2 Eyes/Hair
#3 Size/Weight
(A 13 yr. old responded with, “I see God’s creation! Wow!)

What do you think of when you hear the word beauty?
#1 Nature, God, Creation
#2 Supermodel, Actress (Tall,thin, perfect hair and face)
#3 Inner beauty

What makes you feel beautiful?
#1 Dressing Up
#2 Affirmation (mainly from strangers)
#3 Husband
(A 21 year old responded that she has never felt beautiful.)

Has your dad ever said you are beautiful?
Yes 65%
No 35%

Is beauty important for your overall happiness?
Yes 92%
No 8%

How old were you when you remember first feeling self conscious?
#1 12 years old
#2 8 years old
#3 5 years old

Do the women in your life make you feel valued?
Yes 94%
No 6%

What would you tell the 5 year old you if you could go back and tell her anything?

  • Don’t listen to what others think, don’t let it dictate what you think of yourself.
  • You are going to be told A LOT about beauty and how to be beautiful. As hard as it may be, focus on the fact that God made you beautiful and that’s all that matters! God’s love is more important than anything else.
  • Find your beauty by looking inside not outside. True beauty starts in the heart and works it’s way out.
  • You’re beautiful no matter what!
  • Be true to yourself.
  • Cultivate a lifestyle of health.
  • People are too concerned about themselves to notice all of your flaws.
  • Feel beautiful for yourself on your terms. If you do it for someone else, they will take it with them when they leave.
  • Beauty comes from how you live and treat others. Some of the most beautiful people I know laugh a lot.
  • Love yourself first, be confident!
  • This will pass and you will be fine.
  • Don’t listen to the lies.

This is the 2nd post in a series of posts about beauty and body image. There will be a new post every Thursday about this subject. If you would like to join in the discussion, let me hear from you. All submissions can remain anonymous when posted by contacting me here or you may leave a comment in the section below. If you would like a pdf copy of these results, click here.


Beauty, the Beast and the Product of the Week

It’s no secret that I have had a love/hate relationship with beauty and all that encompasses it. It’s a continual learning process to find a healthy balance. I always love when a friend tells me about a product they love or something new they have started doing that makes them feel great.

I think it would be so fun to create a one stop shop for suggested beauty products, rituals and favorites. Why keep it to yourself? Let’s collaborate and share our secrets for looking and feeling great.

I’ll go first!

This week, my favorite product is…

What? Neutrogena Makeup Remover Cleansing Towelettes.

Where? You can find them at most drug stores, Target, grocery stores and in bulk at Costco.

Why? When I am too lazy to wash my face, I can remove all of my makeup…while lying in my bed.

Cost? Under $10

It’s easy to play. Here’s what you do:

1. List your favorite product or routine in the comments section below (it has to be something that you have tried.) Answer these 4 things, 1. What (Is the product or routine?) 2. Where (can you find it?) 3. Why (do you love it?) 4. Cost (ballpark figure, less than $10, less than $20, and so on.)
3. You may have 100 things, like I do when it comes to mascara, moisturizer and the things we would have a hard time choosing between if asked, “Out of these things, what 1 thing would you take if stranded on a desert island?” You can list a new one each week. Start with your favorite.
4. I will compile the list. We will pick one favorite each week.

Please share this with your friends and in no time we will have a list to rival anything that the magazines are pushing.

Before you go, please answer this 1 question poll and let’s see what you and others are thinking when it comes to the importance of beauty.