Tag Archives: Mommyhood

Five Minute Friday: Connect

Posted on by
14

Around here we write for 5 minutes on Friday. I love today’s topic as I have been learning how important it is to “connect.”
GO

© Joy Cannis and Even A Girl Like Me, 2012

I tend to forget how important connecting is until I am in desperate need of it. I go about my day feeling ostracized (usually by my own doing.) At times it takes a close friend with genuine concern, inquiring about my feelings to snap me out of it and make the needed connection.

As a woman especially, I have a heightened sense of urgency to be and stay connected to other women who are a source of encouragement and beauty in my life. Those whom I can share openly and honestly with and they will point me back to God’s grace.

I watch my children play and interact with each other and others. They have no problem connecting when they need to. And it can be as simple as, “Hey, wanna race to the deep end?” that re-establishes the community that they share.

For us it may be asking a co-worker, “Wanna grab lunch?” It doesn’t always have to be a deep, emotional conversation/connection. The important thing, for me anyway, is remembering that we were created with a need to connect.

Whether it be with my husband, children, friends, or co-workers I use this word as if referring to a life source, because it is.

Who will you connect with today?

STOP

Related articles

Five Minute Friday: Here

Posted on by
10

This post began as a Five Minute Friday post, but continued long after the timer sounded. Something in me could not stop writing and I think that’s okay. There is much stress in life, right now, today. And so my mind drifts…to a place far less stressful…a haven…here.

Here there is no shortage of beauty
The wildflowers grow just beyond the moss sprinkled fence and
roots intertwine to make an adventurous pathway
Here, where the trees touch the heavens
and the mushrooms look like artwork
Here, where the spider spins his masterpiece
while the river cascades over rocks and branches
down a path not yet discovered
Here, where the only thing heard is the sound of
the earth beneath our feet as we walk to the
waterfalls that willing flow down the granite to the body below.
Here, where little boys are transformed into giants,
ninja’s, pirates and superhero’s
Here, where the fire is warm when the sky opens up
to water the earth
Here, where the mountains ascend from green grass
and reflect their magnificence onto the water below
While cotton like clouds sit suspended against the blue sky

Here, where nap time is not only encouraged, it’s required
Here, where I long to residebreathing in deeply while the
sun warms my face and the breeze cools my neck under my long hair.

Here, where heaven is everywhere and God makes Himself known without saying a word.
Where is your here when the noise of life becomes intrusive?

Five Minute Friday: Beyond

Posted on by
11

The subject for today’s 5-Minute Friday post is so fitting for me right now. I started writing about Elliot this morning and was interrupted. When I came back and read the topic I knew there was a reason why I had started writing about my friend. Though some of this was written earlier today, I compiled the post within the 5 minute time limit. This one is for my Elliot.

GO

Thoughts of Elliot consume me. Why now? Why here? No one can plan grief. When it hits…when it leaves…only to return again. It is the uninvited stranger who breaks down the door.
This week Elliot and Chris’ daughter turned 4…without her mother. This picture was taken around this same time last year. I do not have words to describe the kind of sadness I feel when I see her precious face in pictures posted on Elliot’s facebook page.

Heaviness sits on my heart when I think of the family members gathered around singing “Happy Birthday to Bradford…” yet one voice is clearly missing from the group.

It has been just over 8 weeks since Elliot’s passing. Not a day goes by that I don’t think of her. Time goes on. And it will continue to.

There is life beyond the raw reality of death. The ache of never seeing her smile or hearing her voice. The solitude of pain is intense. I am ready to be beyond it.The children visit her grave to leave flowers and kisses. Not yet old enough to understand fully that what the ground holds is a cancer ridden shell that their mother is now free from and has shed for heaven.

Beyond the grave. Beyond the sting of death. Beyond the noise of doubt. Beyond the temporary trappings of this world. My friend sits, waiting for the rest of us. I find solace knowing that she is complete…perfectly healed…and more alive than she has ever been.

“The one thing we owe absolutely to God is never to be afraid of anything…even death, which, after all, is but that final breakthrough into the open, waiting, outstretched arms of Abba.” ~Charles de Foucauld

STOP

“Explorer, Warrior, Son”

Posted on by
7

 

“Don’t climb on that, don’t break anything, don’t be so aggressive, don’t be so noisy, don’t be so messy, don’t take such crazy risks. But God’s design-which He placed in boys as the picture of Himself- is a resounding yes. Be fierce, be wild, be passionate.” ~John Eldridge

Do the words in the quote sound familiar? I feel like I’m saying them all the time. “Don’t do this, don’t do that.” When really, the last thing in the world that I want is for my son to be anything less than he was created to be. The first word that comes to mind when I think of my boys is, adventure. They thrive on it. They have to have it.

Please join me at Lil Light O’ Mine as I share my experience, hopes and prayers for my boys.

 

Star Wars, the Bible and some place in-between

Posted on by
11

Somewhere between awake and asleep is my time to review the adventures of the day with my boys. They say some really interesting things. Last night was no exception and it made me laugh long after I had said goodnight. Consider this a “Sunday funny”…

“The Lord’s Prayer” through the eyes of a child (that happens to be two imaginative little boys.)

Me: “Okay boys, it’s time to calm down, settle in and say our prayers. Remember show respect when praying to the Father.”

C: “Like in Star Wars?!”

Me: “What?”

C: “Luke’s Father?”

Me: “No, like in the bible. Jesus’ Father. God.”

Ri: “Jesus is in Star Wars?!“

Me: “No…”

C: “Star Wars is in the bible?!”

Me: “No…”

C: “Jesus lives in the hearts of the people in Star Wars.”

Ri: “No he doesn’t. Star Wars isn’t real!”

C: “But Jesus is real and He lives in their hearts!!!”

Ri: “MOM! Does Jesus live in Star Wars guys hearts?!”

Me: “Well…I really…”

C: “Not Darth Vador, but everybody else.”

Ri: “NO! Not Darth Maul!“

Me: “Boys! Enough! That is between them and God! We cannot judge another person’s heart.” (Did I really just say that?!)

Ri: “Yeah. Especially if they don’t have one.”

As I closed the bedroom door while blowing them kisses, I had to smile about the conversation that just transpired between two inquisitive little boys and their mama. It made me envious of their young and innocent faith. Too often I put God in a box, as if to contain Him. To them, God is in everything. He is everything. He may even come in the form of a Jedi.

Who’s to say? People can change, right? Maybe Darth Maul turned from his evil ways. I don’t know? But I hope my boys continue to ask questions. Continue to challenge what is thrown out there at them and continue to grow their faith. If it takes illustrating God with Star Wars analogies, then so be it and “May the Force be with you!”

You’re not the boss of Me

Posted on by
33

This was my less than loving response when my incredibly attractive husband walked downstairs and began our first verbal exchange of the day.

It was a Friday and it went something like this…

Him: “Honey, we need to run a few errands and get some things done around the house.”

Me: “I know, but NOT today! It’s my ‘pajama pants wearin’, don’t tell me what to do, day!’ I exclaimed, while shoving another sea salt & turbinado sugar dark chocolate almond in my mouth and chasing it with Peet’s coffee. (Perfect combination if you ask me.)

Him: “Ooooooo-kay.”

Me: “You KNOW this! Friday is MY day to do what I want! And I don’t want to run errands or wash dishes, do laundry or anything else that requires motivation on my day to do what I want! I will do it tomorrow or Sunday, but NOT TODAY.”

Side Note: My man is Sicilian. He is intense and passionate. (Two of the many things that make him irresistible to this southern gal.) Nothing gets his heart racing (in a good or bad way) like I do. I read his cues well at this point and what his deep caramel colored eyes were telling me was that he was maintaining the utmost control by not saying anything. Now, he may have been biting the sides of his cheeks ’til they bled, but I was really proud of him for not engaging my teenage like tantrum.

Him: “Would you mind peeling yourself off the sofa long enough to dress our son so that I can take him to run errands with me?”

I was up grabbing clothes, socks and shoes before he had finished his sentence! (The house all to myself?! You don’t have to ask me twice!)

I don’t know if he passed on telling me that I was acting like a brat because it just wasn’t worth it or because he knows I have enough self awareness by now to realize when my behavior is less than appropriate. I like to believe he was thinking the latter of the two. Either way, he offered to remove distractions, giving me a few cherished moments of “me” time.

I’m a writer. When I’m not able to express myself through written word I feel unsettled with each day that passes. By the time a week has rolled around, I’m ready to implode. I covet the moments when my mind can spill out onto these pages with uninterrupted thought. In fact, there is absolutely no noise other than the tapping of the keys as I write and the intermittent crunching of almonds. Ahhhhhh, serenity now.

So, here’s the deal. I’m keeping my “Don’t ask me to do anything day.” I highly recommend that you do the same. Pick a day that works for you. And by day I mean, several hours, not 24. Oh, and leave out the childish fit, it’s not pretty. Trust me!

Five Minute Friday: Story

Posted on by
10

Yes, I know it’s Saturday morning, but sometimes Friday turns into Saturday before you know it. So, here we are. It’s still Friday somewhere…right?

I haven’t written a 5-minute Friday post in several weeks. I don’t know why exactly? I like this weeks theme of “Story” and after spending time with one of my closest friends last night, I had to join in the conversation.

Everyone has a story and for 5-minutes, here, on this page, I’m going to talk about Jill and a little bit of her story because I want you to be blessed by her life as much as I am. She’s amazing and though I don’t tell her enough, I want her to know that.

GO

I certainly cannot do Jill’s story justice in 5-minutes. But you can read more on her blog at Ramblings on Anything.

Over the last five years, Jill has walked through some of the most difficult “life events” that one can experience.

She lost her mom to cancer, longed for a baby, had a beautiful baby girl, continued grieving the loss of her mother and the reality that her daughter would not meet this incredible woman who had shaped Jill into the woman she is today.

When she and Andy decided they wanted to try for baby #2, she knew it would not be easy. She had proven that “easy” wasn’t necessary. She just needed possible.

Over the next several months, she would deal with the heartache of more than one miscarriage. She walked through it with grace and never lost faith. After a tempestuous season, she is now more than half way through her pregnancy with their second (miracle) baby.

Like I said, 5-minutes isn’t enough to write about this amazing woman and her journey, so in these last 2 minutes that I have to write I will tell you why I consider her one of my dearest friends…

~ She is one of 3 people I know I can call when I am sitting on the floor of my closet with the light off and the door closed, having a moment of mommy insanity.

~ We share a mutual love for Twilight and know that we will go see the latest movie at least three times, not caring what anyone thinks of us! We like to take arm-length pics in the theater even though we know they will be dark and grainy. It’s about memories, not perfect lighting

~ Though she is far from being a germaphobe, she knows that I am and therefore, always has hand sani at the ready.

~ She loves my daughter and treats her like a human being not an annoyance.

~ I know that I can text her at 11:00 p.m. and she will answer.

~ She is the first person I think of and will ask to join me when I want to go to the symphony.

~ She is the only person I go and have mani/pedis with. (She knows I’m weird and will only go where they clean their equipment in an autoclave.)

~ When I am struggling with either something ridiculous or significant, she will treat them both the same and respond with wise and godly counsel instead of allowing me to focus on the things that are out of my control.

~ She has given me a front row seat to her journey through pain and loss, incredible joy and thanksgiving. She lets me walk along side her, sharing the deepest parts of myself and my world while showing me what it looks like to keep a strong faith during times of uncertainty. There is no judgement, only acceptance, grace and a mutual respect for the other. My life is so much better with her in it.

STOP